Sometimes, when I eat, I scroll through the Google News app. Good for the appetite, right? But it’s how I first found out that Mads Mikkelsen and Bryan Fuller were teaming up to do a movie. A children’s movie, at that. I don’t usually watch children’s movies, but I do watch anything that the mess that is Mads Mikkelsen does because he is my boyfriend. Or maybe it’s because I went into the Hannibal TV show with such high, high expectations and fully expecting to be disappointed because Hannibal the Cannibal has always been one of my favourites and I can’t tell you how many times I read the books, but Mads blew me away instantly and is the only one I can picture now as Hannibal. (Except for Gaspard, but I don’t like talking about him because I get very sad.) Or maybe it’s just because Mads is a mess and lives in jumpsuits and had to have his kids yell at him to do a Rhianna video. Who knows? There’s nothing not to love.
Anyway. Bryan Fuller is an amazing director and I’ve seen most of his work. Hannibal was absolutely beautiful. So Mads and Bryan? (Huuugh.) I’d watch a kid’s movie for that.
… except, the closest theatre to me that was playing it was over 4 hours away. Because of course it was. Thanks, rural living. I didn’t have the money for such a trip nor would I physically be able to be in the car that long, see a movie and then drive back home. I’d be in too much pain. So add in a hotel and food and I really didn’t have the money.
So, I waited. I marked the day on my calendar and my wife’s calendar (“Why does this day just say DUST BUNNY!!!) for when it was scheduled to be released to rent on places like Amazon and what not. And you can bet your ass I absolutely rented it that day.
Several thoughts. First of all, was Mads playing a character or was Mads playing himself? I was never quite certain. I asked my wife if she thought he just rolled onto set and they said, “Be you and do your thing.” I mean, either way, it was glorious, but it added to the entertainment. I also wondered if he and Bryan were constantly on a back and forth about his clothing. Sometimes his clothing was complex in design and reminded me of Hannibal, though definitely not as formal, other times I was certain that was just a jumpsuit Mads owned, showed up in and refused to take off. He was and is such a glorious mess.
Then there is Sophie Sloan, the other MC of the film. I didn’t think I’d care about her–I was in it just for Mads, after all–but her deadpan way of delivery and some of her actions (like how she got the money to the neighbor) made me fall instantly in love. She was so matter of fact and didn’t care if anyone believed her. I forget her exact wording, but anytime she was questioned on the reality of her monster, she’d just stare at them and tell them they’d find out when they got eaten.
Visuals, of course, were amazing. There was something about it that I can’t quite put my finger on that almost made me feel like I was watching their adventure in Whoville. (Maybe the way they spoke? Their expressions?) Either way, there was always something new to catch my eye and it was a rare movie where I felt I couldn’t look away for a second or I’d miss something vital. Bryan does that.
Storywise, without any spoilers… perfect. I couldn’t have asked for a better film. I’m not sure it felt very ‘children’s movie’ to me with how dark it got at times, but what can you expect from Bryan. He did his best. I loved the way Mads and Sophie went back and forth with, “Eurora,” “Aurora.” If you want to watch this for anything, watch it for the expression on Mads’ face and the face of Sheila Atim when they finally uncover whether or not Aurora’s “monster” is real or not. I would make that my background.
All in all, I think, a movie everyone should see at least once. If it were free, I would watch it time and time again and I have a feeling I will be saving up to buy the Bluray version when it comes out because I can see it easily becoming one of my comfort movies.
P.S. Gun heels. Really? Really? Also, for fans of the Creep Tapes and who are up to date on the latest season, David Dastmalchian was in it and I spent every second he was on screen imagining Creep/Josef shaking his head in wide-eyed disbelief and saying, “No, no, you’re doing it all wrong.”
